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So this Christmas was going to be one heck of a Christmas. I had things all planned out and it was going to be special. Notice the past tense there? That right, “was going to be”, which means wasn’t. Oh don’t get me wrong, in it own way it was special and Amelia loves the little painted and beautifully decorated nutcracker that Father Christmas brought her, but…but the rest of it was marred by a nasty virus that came to take up residence in my body the Friday night before Christmas this year. I can usually shake them fairly quickly, but not this one. This one hit and hit hard and on Christmas morning I was calling urgent care to make an appointment to get some relief from the sinusitis and the nausea. Amelia and my mum were great about hanging out in the lobby while I was rehydrated and given something to calm my stomach down. 2 hours later, loaded with things to make me feel better I was released.

I love my little girl for all her care and concern and she doesn’t know to be as disappointed and me or my mum are because today we were supposed to be heading up to New York City to see the granddaddy of all Nutcrackers. I had decided that with the first payment of back child support owed by Amelia’s dad that I would splurge – a huge splurge – and buy really good tickets of the NYC ballet’s Nutcracker. We’d go up, have lunch, see the show, see the lights at Rockefeller Center, spend the night with a friend and then come home.

Instead, I’m home trying to keep the acute sinusitis at bay and rally enough for openning a few more prezzies. It’s hard to feel very merry and bright when my nose looks like Rudolph’s nose and my head feels like it’s in a vise. Eventually it will be better and I can start finding the grace in all this, but right now it’s hard. Perhaps I’ll see if Amelia will read to be after breakfast. She’s starting be a real “book worm” and I love that! I got her a couple of Enid Blyton’s “Amelia Jane” books and she devoured one before falling asleep last night. So maybe there is the grace, Amelia can find the delight for me so I can enjoy it all through her unknowing eyes.

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